Rhythmic Action Passages

Binoculars

2009-02-27T12:14:00.003-06:00

I've spent the past 8 days using binoculars in my daily routine. Everywhere I go, I have those guys strapped around my neck, waiting for a great opportunity to see something up close.

"Everywhere?" you ask.

Yes. Everywhere.

This includes:
Concerts, shopping mall, movie theaters, work, "just walkin' around town," open-mic comedy shows, bars, the bank, grocery store, driving, haircut place, post office, dentist.

We'll see how much longer I can go.

Tim and Eric Interview at AVCLUB

2009-01-22T17:44:00.001-06:00

EW: No. And if they did hear about it, they would be happy. Because I know that people go home and get Papa John's because it's been drilled into their heads. People even write me, "I went and got Papa John's, and it was great!" I think even our fake Shrek campaign really worked in their favor.

TH: Well it certainly doesn't hurt. I mean, there's nothing libelous about it. You'd really have to get some irony professor from Harvard to explain to the jury what's bad about what we're doing. [Laughs.]
HERE!

Crap / Not Crap: Laptopping it Alone at the Bar?

2009-01-22T16:41:00.002-06:00

Is it crap that I've been surfing the net by myself at the bar lately (like RIGHT NOW)? Is it better to be reading a book? Does Entertainment Weekly count?

Time Life Archives vol. 1

2008-12-11T14:38:00.011-06:00

Latest Release Roundup

2008-12-10T14:37:00.006-06:00

Here's just a sample of some of the latest release soundtracks you can buy from moviegrooves.com. I'm still waiting for a 180 gram re-release of the Deathwish 3 soundtrack...

Little Monsters
The world premiere release of David Newman's Little Monsters soundtrack - the music from Richard Alan Greenberg's 1989 fantasy starring Howie Mandel, Fred Savage and Daniel Stern.

Composer Newman writes a colourful symphonic score with one ear towards monster chaos and the other ear towards touching a family drama. A beautiful piano theme anchors the human tale and wild strings dominate the monster antics.

Prince of Darkness
Wow. What we've all been waiting for; it's the expanded collectors edition of John Carpenter and Alan Howarth's great soundtrack to Carpenter's 1987 horror movie Prince of Darkness.

The Prince of Darkness soundtrack was originally released on CD at the time of the film's release by Varese Sarabande and contained around forty four minutes of music. This expanded collectors edition comprises of the complete score, as recorded for the film as well as the contents of the original album release, newly remastered - in total, over two hours and twenty minutes of music!

Death Stalker II w/ Chopping Mall

Released in 1986, Chopping Mall, also known as Killbots, was directed by Jim Wynorski, from a script by the director and Steve Mitchell, starring Kelli Maroney, Tony O¹Dell, Russell Todd, Karrie Emerson, Barbara Crampton, Nick Segal, John Terlesky and Suzee Slater, featuring cameos by Paul Bartel, Mary Woronov, Dick Miller and Gerrit Graham. Trapped in Park Plaza Mall after hours, a group of teenagers must defend themselves from a trio of malfunctioning security robots. The film features an early electronic score by composer Chuck Cirino...

Knightriders

We currently hold 1 copy of this item.
more information on stock levels

The Delta Force

the Menahem Golan terrorist action movie Delta Force starring Chuck Norris and Lee Marvin.

Silvestri scores for the Synclavier and anchors with a stirring main hero theme then surrounds with colorful ethnic music and rhythmic action passages. The highlight is the tender theme for Jewish victims that plays first in delicate manner and then grows into an passioned musical statement.

Rock Tourettes

2008-12-03T11:15:00.004-06:00

A while back a friend brilliantly labeled those songs where the singer stutters for effect--Rocknroll Tourettes. I came up with a few with my girlfriend's dad. Any help would be great:

BTO - You Ain't Seen Nothing Yet
B-b-b-baby you ain't seen nah-nah-nothing yet.

Huey Lewis + The News - The Heart of Rocknroll
Du-du-du-du! They say the heart of rocknroll is still beating...

The Knack - My Sharona
M-m-m-my Sharona

Bowie - Changes
Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes Turn and face the strain

The Who - My Generation
(the whole effing song)

Is it uncool to sing like this now?

Doors for Sale

2007-09-21T15:05:00.001-06:00

The University of the South is selling the doors to Woods Lab.
EBAY!!!

I can't wait to read the buyer feedback...
"GREAT SELLER! A++++ Fassssst Delivery!"

Where are they now?

2007-07-20T13:05:00.000-06:00

What's the scoop on the Myers twins these days?

Dr. Steve Brule

2007-06-20T13:41:00.000-06:00

Dr. Steve Brule, played by Academy Award Nominee John C. Reilly, appears on the most evil television show ever created...Tim and Eric Awesome Show! Great Job!. Brule is a health and lifestyle expert on Jan & Wayne Skylar's news program. Always a little out-of-breath and constantly on the verge of an on-air breakdown, Brule is an extreme reflection of those cheery people on the morning shows that try to loosen things up a bit. However, his attitudes and actions swim in uncertainty, leaving him a deer in the headlights. Look into his eyes. In there is a place we don't want to go.

Behold one of my favorite television characters:

Quick Spaz

2007-06-04T09:39:00.000-06:00

If you're gonna spend the dough for a widescreen television, get the aspect ratio correct! Not all shows are broadcast in 16X9! Baseball games aren't supposed to look like Jenny Craig commercials.

God!

Bill and Ted Meets Faces of Death

2007-05-25T12:03:00.000-06:00

The Dream Deceivers!

Sleep well...

Spend Your Weekend with Robert Stack

2007-05-25T09:01:00.000-06:00

If TV warped my fragile, young mind, then the 5 favorites/guiltiest culprits growing up were CHiP's (responsible for my love of irony), The Brady Bunch (ditto, plus I've seen every episode), The State, The Ben Stiller Show, and most notably Unsolved Mysteries.

It seems like the show was always on around the time my family finished dinner.

Wheel of Fortune is over, everything is chill, and then that terrifying theme song pierces its way through my skull and carpet bombs my that sensitive sector that tells me when I need to be afraid.

Out walks Robert Stack, a guy who appears confident, intelligent, and worst of all...trustworthy. If the theme music and the content of the show weren't scary enough, then having a guy like this tell you that a renegade gunman could be in your neighborhood was just as affective as having your dad telling you the same thing, except your dad's not wearing a trench coat.

I was already into horror movies by the time this show was on prime time, but I knew that horror movies were fake. This was real, real. Plus it raised the bar for dramatic reenactments. I became addicted. My friend and I would run around his yard on afternoons pretending to be so-and-so killer and so-and-so victim.

McConaughey!

One of my favorites. Excuse the poor encoding quality:

Thanks to youtube user JPenn80, you can now watch a dickload of Unsolved Mysteries episodes to satisfy your Memorial Day weekend.

God Bless.

John Connor

2007-05-10T13:57:00.000-06:00

Ummmm...if you head over to myspace, you can check out what E. Furlong has been up to. Make absolutely sure you listen to "People Are Strange."

(And the Kyle's High School Senior Quote Award 2007 goes to...)
Sounds like: "I think it sounds like the moment when yr so high you might be, at that time, releasing the beginnings of life into a woman, but you feel so good that it could really be just about anything that you're doing. Anything at all."

Credit for this lead goes to that caller on the May 1st episode of "The Best Show on WFMU".

Being a teenager today...

2007-05-09T15:12:00.000-06:00

So my passion for collecting thrift-store videos has paid off.
Does anyone remember a guy named Ransom? He was my "Pre" dad. I edited this together with all of the best clips.

Through the Sparks

2007-05-01T10:03:00.000-06:00

Here's a promotional video I made for some friends of mine who are releasing a new album this week. My inspiration for this was, as some of you might remember, the "extreme biking" shoot we did in the Lambda backyard one post-ritual morning in 2001 (the same morning that Will plunged into the fire). I think that BJ was one of the bike stars.

Try Our New Bish Screamers

2007-03-09T09:30:00.000-06:00

I was thinking about this whole extreme food thing, and I decided to come up with a new recipe which will debut at a few of our test markets in the next few weeks:

Try our new EXTREME JALAPENO CRUNCH BLOAF!
First we hollow out a 14-inch roll and cake the outside with our secret beef batter, then deep-fry it in 100% vegetable oil. Next, we stuff the hole with jalapeno poppers. Then, you pick a special sauce to fill in the cavern. You have a choice between ranch, melted queso, or cajun hot sauce. Hell! Get all three and make yourself an EXTREME SPICY RANCH JALAPENO CHEESE CRUNCH BLOAF SUICIDE! And for a limited time, we'll cram a few Bison Balls in there for only 99 cents! Only at 'Kinnons.

Guns and Fire

2007-03-07T13:01:00.000-06:00

I just found out that the Dexateens video for "Neil Armstrong" is Paste Magazine's video of the Day. Adam Wingard directed it, and he and I shot it a few months ago just outside of Tuscaloosa. It was really fun breaking stuff and burning stuff. Take a looksy here.

Unfortunately, you might have to install some stupid divx plugin for it to work on their site, and the aspect ratio is stretched out a bit.

Therefore, I have provided you with the faster-loading yet lower-res youtube version:

And while you're at it, buy the Dexateens new full-length Hardwire Healing-- available from the fine folks at the Skybucket label.

Extreme Food!

2007-02-27T09:48:00.000-06:00

Last week my friend John emailed me to let me know that the Captain D's near his movie set has a big sign out front informing the world (or Leeds, AL, rather) that they've unleashed the Torpedo Snack Basket!

On Sunday I was driving past the Rally's (note: Checkers owns Rally's) in North Birmingham, and they've got a pretty good announcement as well:

"Come by and try one of our Chicken or Fish Screamers!"

The Woods

2007-02-08T11:29:00.000-06:00

I had an unexpectedly good day yesterday. Work was slow, so I took off around 1:00 and went to Oak Mountain State Park, a popular Alabama park where I spent a lot of my adolescence (Yes folks, as my Sewanee career would hardly reflect, I used to go hiking all the eff-ing time--oftentimes twice a week after class).

The weather was perfect. No humidity. No jacket required. I went hiking past Peevine Falls and took a ridge trail that unexpectedly ends at the foot of some dense woods. The trail was shorter than I remembered, so I had a bit of time before I'd have to turn around. I wandered around aimlessly for a while and saw a big white-tailed buck running. I then took a nap on the ground.

When I woke up, I spent a good amount of time staring at the sky and the tall trees. Two vultures were circling around. I hoped that if I looked dead, that they would come down and try to peck on me. They didn't buy it, unfortunately.

I spent the rest of my rest-time looking at a pine cone and thought of a unique design for a gaming chair (I don't even play video games!!!), which I quickly tossed out as a stupid idea. I then thought of a revolutionary design for a guitar pick, which I realized was also pretty stupid.
No deep thoughts, unfortunately.

I'm gonna give this blog-shite another try, now that I know how to add titles.

Happy early birthday to Pat! I got you front row tickets to Mother 13!!!

For Angela and Jordan:

2006-11-10T13:51:00.000-06:00

"Love Is a Lie" by Lion, featured in Friday the 13th IV: The Final Chapter.

Unfortunately, this is an incomplete clip, but thankfully, we get to make it to the powerful chorus.

Lion - "Love is a Lie"

Remember my name... Just cause you play it cool Don't think you got me fooled tonight Alright Don't ask me to stay Don't think you got it made No, no You're wrong Cause you can't fake it anymore I know what you're waiting for I should turn away and walk right out that door because I know Love is a Lie With that look in you're eye, you threw it over the skies Love is a Lie It's something you can't deny so baby, why even try You're used to getting your way Not tonight No way Not today I'm not another of your one-night-stands I'm not another of your so-called friends This is where the party ends Cause you can't fake it anymore I know what you're waiting for I should turn away and walk right out that door because I know Love is a Lie With that look in your eye, you threw it over the skies Love is a Lie It's something you can't deny so baby, why even try Ooh Love is a Lie With that look in eye (you threw it away) Love is a Lie (ooo baby tell me why) Love is a Lie (with that look in your eye) Love is a Lie (can't you see that that I'm hurting inside) Love is a Lie (you thinkin of messing my heart) Love is a Lie (ooo, baby) Love is a Lie (ooooh, can't you see that you're living a lie) Love is a Lie (ooh) Love is a Lie (you thinkin of messing my heart) Yeah!

2006-11-10T13:37:00.000-06:00

Former Senator Rick Santorum and family.

Everybody Vote No!

2006-11-09T11:56:00.000-06:00

Wow. I had no clue that anybody had responded to this until now. Thanks to everybody, especially Angela, for the advice. (I had to google Sebago to know what you were talking about).

It's such a tough call, because I hate being transparent (though I probably am more than I realize), and rocking a new shoe puts me in a place kinda like when David Brent tries to mimick Neil's fashion in The Office. It’s obvious, and it’s like wearing a robot badge that plays that Pointer Sisters song “I Gotta New Attitude.”

My behavior is childish, though, and I should just get over this over-analyzing vibe. So here’s the deal:

The Sebago’s (ie. Docksiders, boat shoes) are nice, but I’m a blue jeans fellow and I think that these shoes go better with shorts. They might work out, though, on weekends or nights that I don’t go to a rock show.

The Euro-shoe/sneaker: I’m not violently apposed to the idea, and like Ben said, there’s a wide variety out there. I’ve secretly admired the shoes that my soccer player friends wore in jr high and high school. I think their called “indoor shoes” and they’re black with white stripes and the weird brown soul. I never bought them because I thought that you have to play soccer to wear them. Kinda like how I wouldn’t walk around a shopping mall with an ARMY t-shirt in the fear of being confronted by a real army-man. I did wear an ARMY t-shirt around my freshman year of Sewanee, accept I wrote in sharpy “Of DARKNESS under ARMY. I met Jim Brantley through that shirt. BTW, I like the “baby in the bathwater” phrase. Have you ever heard the phrase “You’re really throwing me under the bus.” I think business people use that one.

The Jelly’s: It’d be a fun challenge to sport these and yet give off a very macho demeanor. However, I’d have to build the macho demeanor first, and that’ll be hard.

So, are Dr Marten’s like completely out of the question? I still wear some mildly-dressy low-cut ones occasionally. What about tough-guy hiking boots—kinda like the shoes that seemingly all of the original guys from the Shipping News wear.

Everybody Scream "Joe!"

2006-11-03T17:22:00.000-06:00

I'm probably the least fashionable guy you know. I rarely ever sway outside of the jeans + t-shirt / flannel unless I'm swimming or something. Well, I have the urge to buy some new shoes, and I wanna know what kind of kicks you think I should be sporting.

I'll probably pass on any form of sandal, and as cool as they are, it would be a desperate attempt to rock the Chuck Taylors for the first time this late in my life. It'd be kind of a mid-life crisis, I think. That said, I need to take a small leap out of my familiar territory (velcro sneakers and Wal-Mart New Balance knock-offs) and thus I might get to push "reset" on my identity-nintendo.

Everybody Make Out!

2006-10-09T12:01:00.000-06:00

Just got notification that the Door Gym I ordered from an Amazon.com seller Karate Depot has been shipped.
Saw a powerful show by Nina Nastasia w/ Cape May last Friday. Seeing Tara Jane next Sunday. God bless the Bottletree.
Had a load of unexpected fun watching Scorsese’s The Departed. Great characters. Great performances. Nobody was ever allowed to be “too cool” (in one scene, Matt Damon’s girlfriend tries to comfort him for an implied premature ejaculation). The photography and editing and sound designed slipped in like a buttered carrot. Never before have I seen Scorsese’s work seem so effortless. Clearly, he is just as excited about film as he was decades ago. Keep in mind I’ve never seen Goodfella’s, Casino, nor The Aviator, so I could be completely wrong.
Still preparing for my lecture on Friday. Is it bad that I don’t even have a thesis yet? I’m about to start editing montages from horror films. Included will be montages of horror= reflection of cultural anxieties, Robin Wood’s notion of The Other, and innovations in photography. I’m also going to include a montage of scenes where “teens” listen to and dance to rock music in 80’s slasher films. My favorite example has been posted on youtube:
Has anyone ever seen Troll 2? Adam W showed it to me after The Departed. It’s possible the worst movie ever made.

Everybody Gain Weight!

2006-10-06T11:59:00.000-06:00

1. Could this Metallica lineup (above) have gone on to be a great band?
2. Does Rob own a pair of blue jeans?
3. Has anyone heard the new Bob Seger album?
4. Would it be a good idea to introduce Barry Alan Walker to a delay pedal?
5. Who does Larry Miller resemble more--Jordan or D. Atkinson?

$10,000 to the first person to answer these correctly.